I placed an online order for my Christian chicken (IYKYK) and rushed to arrive by 10:30 a.m. before breakfast closed. The app told me as long as I got there by 10:30, my little fluffy chicken bites would save me from a day of protein bars and sadness. 10:30 on the nose, I lurched to a halt in front of the cherub-faced drive-through attendant.
“Online order for Dana,” I said breathlessly.
“Awww, we’re out of chicken minis, breakfast is over,” she said matter-of-factly after pulling up my order. “But they’ll refund you at the window.”
On the outside, I often look cucumberishly (made-up word) cool, but on the inside my penchant for efficiency had my temporal, frontal, and parietal lobes in an all-out war for limbic system civility.
Because I know that acting a fool at Christian chicken is a sacred offense, I politely but emphatically said, “But I was here at 10:30, which is what the app said.”
“Well, we stopped cooking new food at 10:28 and we don’t have any minis left. I’m so sorry, we can place your order for lunch.”
Honey, them two minutes of incorrect information just about landed me in the smart-aleck hall of fame, but alas…maturity, composure, and hearing my Grandmother say, “We don’t do that,” stopped me from making a dirty donkey of myself.
This is the part where the Holy Ghost leaned down from heaven and said, “Can you not just smile and order a sandwich like a normal person? You didn’t need those chicken minis anyway, because I watched you eat your oatmeal not 30 minutes ago.”
And then I said to the Holy Spirit, “You again? Let me have my chicken minis in peace without some sword-sharpening situation.”
And then the Spirit said back, “Hold my water.” But I didn’t hear him say it, because I was ignoring him and sulking.
Of course, I wasn’t rude. I accepted my plain chicken nuggets without the heavenly Sister Schuberts envelope (because don’t lie CFA, we all know that’s what they are), and gave a nose-flared smile at “My Pleasure.”
Back to holding the Spirit’s water…can you believe in the middle of my haste over breakfast, I was actually on my way to volunteer for a local children’s charity?
When I got there, someone shared with me the reality of some of the children, teenagers, and twenty-somethings asking for warm blankets, clean clothes, and a decent meal for Christmas. I sat there with the weight of thinking about children my own children’s age sitting in a shelter during Christmas.
The tears started and for the rest of the day, the Holy Spirit parked square in the middle of my throat.
Then, when I left there, the first thing I saw was a truck t-boned in the middle of a car. The airbags were deployed and emergency responders were on the scene.
There are reminders everywhere, but even still we become so accustomed to the dismay that we lose our ability to keep our perspective.
The reality of the world isn’t new to me. I am fully aware of economic fragility and the blessings that fill my arms and heart. But it’s easy, with long checklists and little time, to forget the basics of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and…
SELF-CONTROL; certain instead that injustice lies in that two-minute miscommunication.
With less than a week before Christmas Day, I am thankful for the reminder to let the little things go, extending patience, peace, and kindness in exchange for an edgy retort or a bitter heart.
This time of year can create stress, unearth emotions, and flare tempers, ironically going against the entire meaning of the holiday in the first place.
Let’s all slow down, love one another, and keep our “hardships” in perspective.
Smile at the servers, put the buggies away, check on your neighbors, drop a monetary gift to a charity that will have last-minute Christmas requests, and let the little things go. After all, dirty donkeys are one thing, but real donkeys are quite sociable and learn quickly.
They may hee and haw stubbornly, but deep inside they can detect emotions and be very affectionate.
If a donkey can redirect with a soft heart, then so can we.
